by Nomon Tim Burnett
July 08, 2009
Responding Gate
A monthly letter from Spiritual Director Nomon Tim Burnett
July 2009
Dear Sangha,
Just back from our annual Samish Island sesshin. This formal Zen retreat of 7 days and 8 nights has become an important event for many of us. This year's sesshin was the largest ever at about 60 people in the zendo at any one time. A large, powerful retreat.
Zen practice has a deep flavor of remembering. Not that I'd forgotten how powerful, transformational, and sometimes difficult sesshin can be, part of me remembers that. But every time I attend sesshin it's a powerful feeling of entering into an experience both new and deeply familiar. A feeling of remembering something basic and fundamental.
Sitting zazen steadily for several days within the container of a quiet ordered life has a way of allowing much of our surface concerns and defenses to fall away after a while. This is why it can seem difficult. Sesshin itself although a bit tiring physically is not itself particularly difficult or easy. It's just a container. Within that container the great joys and difficulties that arise are of our own making. They arise out of our conditioning - out of our karma. And as conditioned life meets Buddha within the container of sesshin there is great potential, really great potential. For healing, for strife, for opening. Difficult things can be uncovered but once uncovered there is potential for awareness and healing.
The big themes of my sesshin this year also had the quality of remembering. That strong "oh yeah…" feeling one can have when something deeply familiar but somehow buried just below the surface arises.
One theme for me was a strong tendency to focus and magnify events and ideas that seem to indicate failure. To focus on what's wrong out of proportion. And as an organizer and receiver of feedback I was privy to much information about the many little things that are not quite to someone's liking at sesshin. And I found it disturbingly easy to sink into a perspective where everything seemed wrong. The whole sesshin a big disaster. Much suffering there. I suspect I am doing this all the time to various extents.
Norman offered me a helpful teaching about this: to take up the study of the source of this suffering. What is the source? Not just to cheer up or look on the bright side, but to look more deeply and directly at the suffering itself.
This is one of the things I appreciate so much about Zen practice: this encouragement to go deeper, to investigate what's beneath the surface. Not to just talk myself out of these difficult emotions about how wrong everything was going. Not to try to cheer myself up. Not to surround myself with people telling me it's all great, that I'm doing a great job, that sesshin was going wonderfully, but allow the space in my heart to deeply feel the suffering of negativity and judgment and make use of that pain.
There's a way that we conventionally seek support that can obscure our hearts, cheer us up in the short term but prevent real growth and exploration. Sometimes that's appropriate, we just need to be held, but sometimes we can access a more powerful type of support that allows us to feel. To go deeper. To follow that suffering deeper into the caverns of the heart and see what can be found there.
Another thing about sesshin is that it's a communal ritual. We go into it thinking of it as a kind of workshop where each of us will be treated to excellent conditions for meditation, a nice quiet corner to sit in, we like the idea of supportive people around us but probably not too close to us. We want a little space. And to have everything taken care of is great too: no meals to cook, a place to sleep, a beautiful place to be (and wow, the end of Samish Island where the camp is quite astoundingly beautiful). But when we get a few days into it we remember that it's actually one long interactive communal ritual. Life as ritual and that ritual includes everyone there, and everyone who's touched our hearts who isn't there, it includes our parents and families, it includes many many beings. We don't get to have our own space like we'd thought. This can be a source of some difficulty and great wonder as well.
Sometimes they use the analogy of washing a bunch of dirty potatoes. Instead of washing them individually one by one you can take your potatoes and dump them in a big tub of water. Then swirl them around and as they rub together they get cleaner and cleaner. But from the potatoes' point of view how does that feel? Like a lovely back rub from a dear friend? Or like rubbing against a grouchy person who is in your space and not following the Zen forms quite right? Well a bit of both I suppose. And sometimes this potato analogy is way too gentle, sometimes it's more like rocks in the rock polisher with plenty of that gritty stuff you put in there to rub the rocks raw and shiny.
And this rubbing together helps us to access our deepest feelings. It makes the whole thing work. Helps us drop below the surface of our comfort. I could never have noticed anything being "wrong" in the ways that I did if I was at sesshin all by myself. We have a way of arranging our Titanic deck chairs pretty well when we're on our own. In sangha life, inside and outside sesshin, there's always someone else there with their own idea of how to arrange things and we can discover anew the ways we're attached to our idea. And we suffer. And we learn. And we grow.
This is something we can help each other with all the time. This is the powerful opportunity, obligation even, of sangha life. To tell truth to each other in a loving way. To support each other in both feeling a little better and also in feelings more deeply our most difficult feelings and tendencies. To grow and heal together. Sometimes our raw edges are going to hurt when we rub them together. Sometimes being together is the most beautiful thing there is.
Rub-a-Dub-Dub….
Thank you very much to the many local sangha members who's cooked food for my family. A much appreciated, practical and helpful bit of support organized by Kathy McKenna - thank you Kathy!
Board News
Board Treasurer Greg Greenan has
informed us that he's having trouble finding time in life to continue on as
Treasurer. A big thank you to Greg for several years of service to the sangha.
If you are interested in serving as our next Treasurer please us know. One
need not have any particular expertise with finances, just an interest in
helping the sangha in a leadership role with a focus on our financial future
and policies. Please see the workgroups site, the big org chart, or talk to
any Board member, for more information.
Red Cedar Zen Community Board of Directors
|
Jeff McKenna, President |
pjmck@earthlink.net |
966-3414 |
|
Mary Apple, Vice President |
mo4metta@yahoo.com |
380-3151 |
|
Greg Greenan, outgoing Treasurer |
greg@zenderthurston.com |
647-1500 |
|
Brian Davidson, Secretary |
misfit138@hotmail.com |
510-9780 |
|
Tim Burnett, Spiritual Director |
tim@redcedarzen.org |
305-0686 |
Contacting the entire Board by email can be done by emailing a message to
leadership@redcedarzen.org
This will copy every current member.
The phone line at the building (Voice Mail checked by Welcome Workgroup) is 360-312-7088
It does quietly ring downstairs you might reach someone if you call during an event.
For more on the Board and the Workgroups please see the new workgroups site. Follow the workgroups link from the main www.redcedarzen.org website or direct link is
http://sites.google.com/site/redcedarzendocs/w/
Workgroup & Volunteering News:
The Board met with the Outreach and
Welcome workgroups last night at our meeting. Many people are putting in
steady efforts to keep things running smoothly. Very heartening. And it does
seem like even though there are still gaps in places the workgroup structure
is helpful in defining the work and allowing people to rotate and move around
more consciously. I hope this will help the volunteer efforts continue to feel
sustainable.
A few current volunteer needs:
Zendo & Programs
Flower Chiden - someone to maintain flowers on the altars. See Tim.
Outreach
Publicist - someone to submit our events to various community calendars and media. See Mary.
And a few thank you's:
Building
The beautiful new trim in the Dharma Hall is thanks to Lou Hinkle (planning, milling), Don & Dale
McClary (milling), Jeff McKenna & Talus Latona (finishing), and Bob Penny (installing). And probably a few other people too. Great job everyone, looks great.
Also the lovely new table top in the lobby is Lou Hinkle's doing. Thanks again for the that, Lou.
Zendo & Programs
Registrars - Barb Crowley and Karen McMains. A great team handling the registration for our events are now catching their breath after Samish. Both have offered to continue for another year. Deep thanks.
And we were sorry to learn that Fran Hecht who's been a steady member and committed volunteer is moving away in September. We wish her well in her next adventures. Thank you Fran for all you've given us.
Physicality of Zen (the forms)
The Practice Committee just met and we are in strong agreement that it is a good time to put more emphasis on instruction and support in the forms of Zen practice. In how we work with our bodies in Zen. Sometimes Zen is underappreciated as just a meditation practice with some stuff to do before and after. Actually Zen is a whole body discipline that radiates outward from the zafu to our whole lives. Fully feeling and living the Zen forms as that and not just rules or procedure is a powerful part of the practice.
So we hope to work with these forms in a bit deeper way than maybe we have before. Far from just rules on how to hold your hands in the zendo, and deeper even than mindfulness practices, the ways we walk and sit and stand in the zendo can be a powerful expression of our understanding - truly zazen in action.
So look for more training available in the forms and also more offers from the teachers and senior students to support you in finding the way forward for your particular body and mind within the container of the Zen forms.
New form for being late:
One form change (or clarification, most Zen places do this) we are implementing now is we ask that no one enter the zendo after the three bells have run starting the zazen period. If there is a priest opening the zendo already at the mat or making incense offerings then it is also too late. We will set up zafu and zabuton in the library and invite you to sit the first period there and rejoin the zendo when you hear the bell ending the zazen period. This is to protect the zendo from disturbance. The times we have to sit quietly together are rare so let's respect the quiet and peacefulness in the zendo by doing this practice.
One thing to remind yourself: you are not bad or a failure if you are late. Even then just follow the form with a good spirit and your practice is unfolding as it should. In this case sit in the library with the same intention and fullness of practice that you would in the zendo and let those sitting in the zendo support you as you support them. And do please feel completely welcome to come in at the end of zazen for service or walking meditation or whatever is next on the schedule.
Financial Update
It's looking very good. Reliable income from members and renters (especially our principal tenant Bellingham Insight Meditation Society) plus extra from retreats (especially the Samish Sesshin) have us solidly on track to come out on of ahead of our 2009 budget. You can track our progress here:
http://sites.google.com/site/redcedarzendocs/w/finance/budget
(One thing a little confusing: a negative number on "Remaining Expected" income means we are already ahead of our annual goal for that category of income. The big numbers are all about Samish, note that "Retreat/Workshop Registration Income" is $6,094 ahead of budget but the corresponding "Retreat/Workgroup Expense" is $5,502 over budget. This because Samish was bigger than last year).
If you have been considering joining as a Member of Red Cedar Zen Community or a Friend of Red Cedar we can make good use of your support. Increasing our membership income further is essential for stability and the future. It will allow such items as:
(1) building our savings,
(2) reinstate my stipend,
(3) the ability to consider new projects,
(4) start saving towards an eventual capital campaign to purchase a building.
But for now I am very happy to be able to tell you that currently it looks like we are able to afford our building and current operations given our current membership and renters. This is really great.
Thank you again, it's wonderful that we can stay in this wonderful building and sharing our practice from such a warm and inviting base.
upcoming events
Red Cedar Zen Community invites you to participate in any of the following upcoming events. For more information about these events, including online registration, visit our web site at www.redcedarzen.org.
July 2009
Saturday morning meditation and breakfast
July 4th & 18th. 6am-8:30am
Red Cedar Dharma Hall
Saturday morning meditation and potluck breakfast on the first and third Saturdays of each month.
It is beautifully quiet in the Dharma Hall at 6am. Coming late is okay, arrive on the half-hour and enter during kinhin only please.
Metta Sutta class with Nomon Tim Burnett
Fridays 12:50pm - 1:50pm July 10, 17, (not 24), 31, and August 7
Red Cedar Dharma Hall (Drop in, no advance registration needed)
"This is what should be accomplished by the one who is wise, who seeks the good, and has obtained peace..." so begins this classic short Buddhist text on loving kindness, or metta. We chant the Metta Sutta in our noon service.
This course will investigate the origins and meaning of this text. We will consider together its applicability in our lives and the references to teachings and practices included in the text and other texts and commentaries on metta.
Drop in, no registration required. $5-$10 suggested donation per class for the teacher (checks directly to "Tim Burnett" please).
Fridays immediately after noon zazen from July 10th through August 7th, note no class on July 24th but the group might meet for discussion without Tim.
August 2009
Full Day Zen Sesshin with Nomon Tim Burnett & Yuzan Nancy Welch
Saturday August 01, 6:00am - 9:00pm
Red Cedar Dharma Hall (please register in advance, online or forms at the Hall)
An opportunity for deep zazen training all day at our Dharma Hall with our local teachers. Oryoki meals.
This retreat is an appropriate way for newer sitters to try out sesshin practice and a good way for more experienced people to train more deeply in zazen. Oryoki training available on request and
Women's Retreat
Sunday, Aug 16, 8 am-1pm
Red Cedar Dharma Hall (simple email/phone registration)
Join us for this first ever Women's Retreat. Sitting meditation, tea served in silence, discussion and a ritual following the retreat theme, "Being Kind to Ourselves". This retreat is open to other Buddhist sanghas as well as to interested non-Buddhists.
We are not using the formal, on-line registration. Contact Joan Casey to sign up: 647-2346, or joancasey@comcast.net
Summer Dharma Hall Picnic
Saturday August 29, 2:00pm - 6:00pm
Lake Padden, South End Picnic Shelter
Our summer picnic is coming up, a joint production with Bellingham Insight. Everyone connected to the Dharma Hall is warmly invited to attend.
September 2009
Mountains and Rivers Hiking Retreat
with Bob Penny, M.S., and Nomon Tim Burnett
Thursday September 10, 7:00pm - Sunday September 13, 5:00pm
Mount Baker area
Our annual 3-day Zen and hiking retreat - gentle 4-mile backpack into the Mt. Baker Wilderness.
More details and a photo essay on the website. This is a wonderful experience!
Photo registration call Bob Penny at (360) 398-8834
October 2009
October Study Retreat with Norman Fischer
Saturday October 10, 8:00am - Sunday October 11, 4:00pm
Red Cedar Dharma Hall (Registration has not yet begun)
Our annual two-day Zen studies retreat with Zoketsu Norman Fischer, on the topic of the koan of our daily life as expressed by Dogen in his important essay Genjo Koan.
yours,
Tim
Nomon Tim Burnett
Spiritual Director
Resident Priest Nomon Tim Burnett has been a student of Zoketsu Norman Fischer since 1987 when he was a resident at San Francisco Zen Center's Green Gulch Farm. After sitting practice periods at Green Gulch and Tassajara Zen Monastery, Tim helped found the Bellingham Zen Practice Group in 1991. Tim was ordained as a Zen Priest by Norman in June, 2000. Like his teacher, Tim is interested in the possibility of deep and complete practice by lay people.
A person of wide-ranging professional interests, Tim has been a botanist, elementary schoolteacher, writer, and computer programmer. In addition to his work at the Resident Priest of Red Cedar Zen Community, Tim works as a software developer.